This is the second in a five-part series on Sexual Styles. Here is Part One.

Have you ever been so fully absorbed in a sexual experience that the rest of the world seemed to fade away? This altered state of all-consuming focus on erotic stimuli and sensations is what psychologist Donald Mosher termed “sexual trance.”1 In his influential theory of depth involvement in human sexual response, Mosher proposed that tuning into our senses and shutting out distractions is a powerful pathway to achieving more profound physical and emotional engagement during intimacy.2

Recent studies have further illuminated the role of sensory immersion in heightening sexual arousal and pleasure. Research indicates that mindful attention to erotic cues, both external and internal, is linked to greater sexual satisfaction, particularly for women.3 Brain imaging also shows that focused awareness on genital sensations is associated with increased activation in regions involved in sexual response.4

When sexual trance is the preferred pathway

For some individuals, entering an immersive sensual state is their primary mode of connecting intimately with a partner. Mosher outlined that people tend to favor one of three key dimensions – role enactment, partner engagement, or sexual trance – as their go-to path for achieving depth of involvement during lovemaking.1

Those who gravitate toward sexual trance often deliberately set the stage for minimizing distractions and maximizing sensory input. They may prefer a dark, quiet environment, scented candles, soft music, or sensual fabrics to help them surrender more easily into erotic absorption. Slower, repetitive caressing and rocking rather than frequent changes in position or technique allows them to deepen their focus incrementally.

Even their sexual fantasies take on a more free-flowing, impressionistic, sensory quality instead of an elaborate storyline. They might imagine colors, abstract shapes, or surreal dream-like symbolism rather than specific scenarios or dialogue.1 Ultimately, someone with a predisposition toward sexual trance experiences their most satisfying eroticism as a transportive journey inward.

Levels of depth in sexual trance

Mosher proposed that immersion in sexual trance occurs on a continuum from shallow to deep involvement. In the initial stages, a person’s critical faculties are still partially engaged, and they may be somewhat distractible by random thoughts or background stimuli. However, as they persist in directing their focus to erotic input, their usual reality-orientation starts to fade, and a more dream-like state takes hold.

At moderate depth, an individual becomes predominantly consumed by the special sexual sensations and atmosphere they are co-creating with their partner. It requires some concentration to maintain, but it is an increasingly effortless and captivating process. Eventually, with enough uninterrupted immersion, they cross a threshold into complete absorption.

In the deepest stage of sexual trance, a person enters an eyes-closed, almost meditative state of pure sensory fascination. They are no longer intentionally directing their focus but feel irresistibly and involuntarily pulled into the erotic spell. Some describe it as an ecstatic dissolution of the ordinary sense of self into a union of energetic, pulsing, primal aliveness.5

Recognizing sexual trance

So what does sexual trance look and feel like in action? One key characteristic is an intense, unwavering concentration on immediate erotic stimuli to the exclusion of everything else.2 You might find yourself captivated by the sight of your partner’s body, the sound of their sighs, the scent of their skin, or the flavor of their kiss. Background noises, worries, and self-conscious thoughts all temporarily recede as you zero in on savoring each sensation.

Another sign is feeling dreamy, floaty, or mildly disconnected from your ordinary waking consciousness. Some people describe it as being pleasurably “lost” in the moment, as if they are melting into pure erotic perception. Mosher notes sexual trance involves a voluntary surrendering of the usual “generalized reality orientation” as sensual awareness takes over.1

Facilitating the flow state

How can couples help each other access this deliciously immersive flow state more readily? The first step is to minimize potential intrusions on your sensual cocoon. That means putting phones on silent, ensuring privacy, and agreeing to set aside any difficult emotional discussions for later.5 Eliminate whatever pulls focus from seductively drinking each other in.

Once you’ve carved out a distraction-free erotic oasis, experiment with elongating foreplay to allow your absorption to build gradually. Mosher’s research suggests extended sensual touching, rather than making a beeline for the genitals, cultivates the conditions for sexual trance.1 Spend ample time caressing, teasing, and appreciating every inch of your partner’s body as if it is your sole fascination. Encourage them to do the same for you, noting the nuances of sensation that arise.

You can further deepen immersion by closing your eyes to block out visual stimuli and focus on soaking up tactile and auditory input. Many couples also find rhythmic, synchronous breathing together can foster a sense of merging into shared sensual awareness.3 Ultimately, the key is learning to surrender your mind utterly to the entrancing erotic moment.

Summary

While sexual trance is just one of three dimensions of depth involvement Mosher outlined, it offers a uniquely accessible gateway into richer realms of intimacy.1 By understanding how to minimize distractions, elongate sensual exploration, and melt mindfully into erotic absorption, couples can experience the excitement of being transported together to altered states of pleasure. The next time you make love, try inviting each other to get blissfully lost in the sensual sensations and see where this immersive focus takes you.

Footnotes

  1. Mosher, D. L. (1980). Three dimensions of depth of involvement in human sexual response. The Journal of Sex Research, 16(1), 1-42.
  2. Mosher, D. L. (2005). Depth of involvement in human sexual response. In P. Kleinplatz & C. Moser (Eds.), Sadomasochism: Powerful pleasures (pp. 81-114). Routledge.
  3. Adam, F., Géonet, M., Day, J., & de Sutter, P. (2015). Mindfulness skills are associated with female orgasm? Sexual and Relationship Therapy, 30(2), 256-267.
  4. Wise, N. J., Frangos, E., & Komisaruk, B. R. (2017). Brain activity unique to orgasm in women: An fMRI analysis. The Journal of Sexual Medicine, 14(11), 1380-1391.
  5. Perel, E. (2006). Mating in captivity: Reconciling the erotic and the domestic. Harper.